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Watermelon may very well be the best flavor. Why? Well, think about it. Watermelon itself is very good. (It's like you're eating and drinking at the same time). Then you got the watermelon Jolly Ranchers, which are excellent, watermelon Blow-Pops, Popsicles, basically anything with watermelon flavoring tastes good.
Apple flavoring is hit or miss. Grape either tastes really good or it tastes like cold medicine. A lot of the other ones don't even taste like a fruit, or anything else for that matter. Some companies have even given up trying to pretend that it has any real flavor to it so they just call it "blue" or "red" or whatever. Actually, not even the watermelon flavoring tastes like watermelon, but it does taste good.
Why do we start off with salad?
I agree that dessert should go last, because it is the easiest to find room for, but it makes more sense to eat the main dish first and then salad.
The main dish is what you need to fit down there. Salad is light, and easy to polish off after you've eaten the meat and potatoes. I mean, when you pack a suit case you don't throw a couple of shirts in first. You stick your shoes in there and books and anything else that takes up a lot of room that can't be squeezed in later...same basic principle.
I dunno, maybe most people aren't trying to figure out how to fit more food in their stomach.
I normally eat my corn in rows, left to right.
When I put my pants on, I put my left leg on first.
When I take them off, I take off my left leg first.
But, when I put my shoes on, I put my right shoe on first.
When I eat, I hold my fork in my right hand, and my knife in my left.
I normally sneeze in twos, and it's normally when I walk outside that I need to sneeze.
The toilet paper should roll forward, over the top, not behind like some people put it.
When I brush my teeth, I start on the bottom left.
I do everything right handed and right footed, but if I'm bored in class I take notes with my left hand to practice for when I break my hand or something, if that ever happens.
I part my hair on the left side, even though it always disappears after a couple of minutes.
The vision in my left eye is worse than in my right eye, but with my contacts in I see better with my left eye.
Weird huh?
Have you seen me? My name is Jon's cell phone.
This is all that is left of my phone...a picture of it, that isn't actually it, but one that looks just like it but newer that I found on the web.
If I were my cell phone, where would I be? I don't really know, because I've never been a cell phone before.
I do tend to lose things more than other people. I have lost lots of things out here at BYU; tons and tons of pens and pencils, my TI-83, my camera, a sweet highlighter that had a pen on it too, a pair of converse all-stars, my basketball shoes, a pair of jeans, a BYU t-shirt, a black belt, a BYU hoodie, two beanies (in one winter), my keys (many times), my wallet (especially during vacation; i've had to use my passport at least twice that I can remember as ID to get on a plane), my phone, my car (twice, for a while I thought it was stolen), a flash drive (got it back in the BYU lost and found), and my watch (got it back twice in the lost and found) to name a few.
I guess I'm scatterbrained. A lot of the time my hands just pick stuff up and put them places as I pace around (another habit of mine). My mind isn't even conscious of it.
I'm surprised I've never accidentally stolen something while shopping.
After much contemplation, I still can't figure out why people keep buying bottled water.
You can buy a bottle of water for up to a dollar at some places, so a gallon would be three or four dollars...That as much as gas costs. Gas!
I know we all need water to survive, but nobody needs to spend a dollar on a bottle of water. "What? Do you think water is just falling from the sky?" Yes! Water is the most abundant resource on the planet. It is literally everywhere. Some places in the world have so much water they are flooding, and they are trying to get rid of the water.
I know what some of you are thinking. "But I buy my water in bulk at Costco so it's only 30 cents a bottle." Well I've got secret for you. It's free! Just turn on the tap...
When we were little, my brothers and sisters and I would pick days that would be opposite day, and then we would say the opposite of what we meant to each other...Also a good way to get out of doing chores when you're asked.
Chew on this though; you can never say "It's opposite day" and not be lying.
Sometimes when I see people I know in random places where I didn't expect to see them, I don't feel like talking to them so I avoid them.
It's worse if I can't remember their name. In that case I duck, turn, or do whatever I have to do to avoid coming into their line of sight. If I know their name then I might go up to them and say hi, or I might just start walking in the other direction even though that's not where I want to go...just depends on my mood. (None of this applies to people I know really well, just people that I kind of know, like that used to be in my ward or something but I never really got to know them).
I don't think I'm agoraphobic or anything, nor do I think I'm antisocial. It's just so awkward sometimes, and I avoid awkwardness.
I also think it's awkward after a temple sealing when everyone hugs the bride and groom (or kisses in Jared Meier's case) on their way out. I don't think most people think this is awkward, I just...I don't know, but it is.
Actually, I just looked up antisocial on the source of all knowledge (wikipedia) and decided that I am not antisocial, but it looks like I may have albuminurophobia, anglophobia, and arachibutyrophobia.
Some peeps use lots of abbreviations, not only in writing, but in speech. Some common examples include: the mish, jk, bfd, lol, cpk, mickey d's, the peaks, and bom.
I say these sometimes, mostly as a joke, but I can't tell if I'm being funny, or being a loser...whatevs, I think it comes with being LDS. We abbreviate everything; mia, motab, jsb...ttyl
Anytime you have to start out by saying, "No offense, but" you are going to offend someone.
Why would anyone think that asking the person not to take offense before saying something would change whether or not they take offense?
"No offense, but you are the lamest person I know."
"Hmm, well, I would normally take offense to that, but since he told me 'no offense' I guess I can't be offended."
Not likely.
"The Dark Knight" recently broke records, a box office record of $66.4M among others. However, it seems like every year movies are breaking records. Why could that be possibly? Hmm, I wonder. Could it be that we are completely ignoring a little thing I like to call "inflation"?
Maybe this is the economist in me, but if I were the one keeping the record books, I would adjust all records set in the US and elsewhere for the inflation in each represented country. It only makes sense. I mean, a movie in the 40's never could have made $66.4M so quickly, even if twice as many people went to see it as saw "The Dark Knight."
For similar reasons, I don't think it is fair to compare athletes from different eras. When people try to say "John Doe was the greatest tennis player that ever played," it's hard for me to really swallow that. Who knows if he was the best. He never played any of the greats from other eras.
Not only are the players constantly changing, but in a lot of sports rules even change, and conditions, not to mention hair styles and shorts length. I only think its fair to assign a player, "the greatest player of his time" titles. Like Michael Jordan for example. He was the greatest basketball player of his time. But we don't need to waste time comparing him to people that played decades before him, nor do we need to compare him to next years rookies.
But that's just my opinion.
I have two sleep theories based on personal observations.
1. The benefits of sleep follow the pattern outlined in this graph. It basically says that there isn't a lot of benefit from getting only a few hours of sleep, but the jump between getting six and seven hours of sleep is a huge difference. And between seven and eight is a big difference too, but after eight the benefits don't increase much, and even start to go down. When you get more than nine hours of sleep, you just feel like a loser the rest of the day.
2. When you don't get very much sleep, the effects are stronger the following day, and not the day that you got little sleep. So if you only get four hours of sleep, that day you may not be too tired, but the day after you will be drained, even if you get lots of sleep that night. That's why two nights before a test is when I try to get a good nights rest.
Of course, neither of these are tested (by me at least, maybe someone out there has proven them true or false) but they seem true to me.
Why are there so many sprinklers that water the sidewalk? Seriously, every time I go running someone has a sprinkler on that is watering the sidewalk.
I mean, when I'm running I don't even care, cause it feels good, but is it really that difficult to just water your lawn?
I'm not necessarily talking about the sprinklers that attach on the end of a hose, because I guess sometimes those are harder to adjust and what not, but if you have a system installed in your house, wouldn't they be able to make it just water the grass when they install it?
Even parks (and BYU) have water running down the street and into the sewer because they miss the lawn.
Obviously it's not a really big problem, but a peculiar one because it doesn't seem like it would be too hard to fix.
Maybe that is the problem right there...it's so simple that nobody will bring themselves to fix it, kind of like how I keep avoiding organizing this pile of stuff that has accumulated next to my bed. It wouldn't take long, but, I dunno...you know?
This is an imitation Barbie in imitation Jell-O...
I obtained this doll from an April Fools joke played on me this year. I figured it would be funny to stick it under my roommate's pillow one day, and then it turned into a game...we would take turns hiding her till the other one found her. She made it on the ceiling fan (luckily I saw her before I turned it on), in the shower, in the refrigerator (holding the milk jug), and for this last one I put her Jell-O...she is supposed to look like she is swimming.
Hey-o, everyone out there in SyberWorld. Here are some of my favorites (I can't include things like favorite movie or candy bar because I can't decide...):
My Favorite...
Color: Blue
Holiday: Christmas
Hymns: "Joseph Smith's First Prayer" and "Redeemer of Israel"
Church Movie: "Mr. Kruger's Christmas"
Six Flags Ride: Batman
Cartoon: Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner
Children's Game: Hide and Seek
Ninja Turtle: Michaelangelo
Number: Infinity+2...there's nothing higher than that
Harry Potter Book: Half-Blood Prince
Chips: Hint of Lime Tostitos
Disney Princess: Aurora
Harrison Ford Movie: The Fugitive
Bad Actress: Emma Watson
Good Actress: Audrey Hepburn
Utahism: Expecially (meaning especially...incidentally, if you are from Utah, you may not know what I'm talking about)
Church Dance Fast Song: Come on Eileen - Dexy's Midnight Runners
Church Dance Slow Song: I Do It for You - Bryan Adams (I like this one because you get to the point in the song where it sounds like it is over so you stop dancing and then it starts up again and there is that awkward 'should I go find the girl I just stopped dancing with and keep dancing?' struggle)
Have you ever been grocery shopping when you're hungry? It is a totally different experience than when you are not hungry. Everything looks good. Normally you eye prices, compare foods, look around...but when you're hungry you just start throwing things in your cart, not even thinking about it.
Canned asparagus? Yeah that looks good. How about some sardines in oil? Why not, it's got protein.
Then you rush home and eat something and you're not hungry anymore and you look back at all the food you just bought and realize what just did...bought a bunch of food you will never eat. No joke, I have even been tempted to buy those milk bone dog treats before...they kind of look like they have frosting on the outside...might be good, I don't know...the dogs sure like them.
It's always hard to open up your scriptures when everything is quiet during a lesson or a talk or something because there is that loud zipper noise. You have to make that key decision: do you try and do it quick enough that it's not distracting to everyone, or do you try to do it slowly so it doesn't make very much noise?
Mostly I go slowly and try to muffle the noise by putting my finger on the zipper as I go, but my new scripture case doesn't muffle well...
It's also awkward when you are trying to have a whisper conversation with someone in a quiet area, like the library or in a class, when they don't really know how to whisper.
Some people are just whisper shouters...
Ok, I don't mean to poke fun of Hank Steinbrenner, but after reading this quote I seriously wonder about his grasp on reality:
"This is a Yankee country. We're going to put the Yankees back on top and restore the universe to order."
Restore the universe to order? I don't think there needs to be any retaliation to this comment...I don't think anyone will take it seriously...
I always wonder about these forwarded mass emails. What do I wonder?...I wonder why?
Why am I supposed to forward it to everyone I know within five minutes?
Why will it bring me good luck if I do?
Why should I believe that it worked for someone else when I don't even know them or how lucky they are?
Why should I believe any of the ridiculous stats they throw at me, like "this email has already made it around the world ten times?" What does that even mean?
What disaster could possibly befall me should I delete the email before forwarding it?
Really though, is someone trying to break a world record with these seemingly pointless forward emails, or what? I wonder...
To quote Michael Scott, "I'm not super stitious...but I am a little stitious."
I know I do things that are annoying to some people, so if I know that it annoys someone I stop doing it, but otherwise I just go for it, like singing in the shower (one time I woke up Mike on accident, I didn't realize I was so loud), singing along with songs in the car (but I always invite everyone else to sing along too, and I turn up the music so we all sound just like the actual singer), quoting movies as they go (I just can't help myself sometimes), making fun of movies as you watch them.
I mean, what is the point of watching a movie by yourself? The most fun part is making comments about the movie as it goes, and if you're alone, you would just be talking to yourself, in which case you are definitely not annoying anyone, but you might have other issues.
The exception to talking is if you are seeing the movie for the first time and it is kind of complicated, in which case you might miss crucial dialog.
On a side note, I have seen one movie by myself in the theater, but that was one of those, "we'll meet you inside" deals where they never showed up. Am I a loser because of that? No, they are the losers. But actually, it was kind of lame movie, so maybe...we'll call it a draw.
Fake movies that sound like they would be bad movies, yet people would probably still see:
Once Upon a Nightmare (A man comes back from the dead suffering from amnesia and falls in love with his daughter only to find that she is a zombie)
Back to the Shire (Author JR Tolkien, as a result of childhood trauma, becomes schizophrenic and develops a second personality as a hobbit)
Not Another High School Football Movie (...the underdogs win...)
Love Me Twice, Shame on Me (An unlikely couple finds love only to discover that she has a terminal illness. After they break up she is miraculously cured and they get back together only to have him dump her once again for unrelated reasons)
Death Sentence (An uneducated man receives a letter in the mail that contains only one sentence and he must correct its grammar within one week or else he will die)
Watermelon may very well be the best flavor. Why? Well, think about it. Watermelon itself is very good. (It's like you're eating and drinking at the same time). Then you got the watermelon Jolly Ranchers, which are excellent, watermelon Blow-Pops, Popsicles, basically anything with watermelon flavoring tastes good.
